Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Dont' Regret Anything That Once Made You Smile

My heart beats too fast
yet it still beats so slow.
And what hurts it the most
is that you'll never know.

I think about nothing,
just to get rid of your face.
Yet you pop out of that nothing
to be set in your place.

Whenever I see you
I try hard to smile.
But what I really want to do is cry
and just run for miles.

It's hard when your heart
keeps hold of one that you need.
The one that you love,
who makes you feel free.

Why can't you just see
you're hurting me so?
I need you near,
but you want to go.

You say you want me back,
you want to be my man.
You want to start this all over,
go back to where we began.

Should I let you in,
give you a second chance?
Let my heart be yours again,
and let us have the final dance.

These words haunt me everyday
in my mind and in my dreams.
My mouth will never tell you,
even though my heart screams.

I need an explanation,
I need to know why.
Was our relationship nothing to you?
Was it just a lie?

Or how about those nights we spent
looking at the stars.
I thought I'd be yours forever
but now my heart has scars.

What we had was special
in a fantasy sort of way.
The definition of true love...
Or at least that's what I used to say.

But now I just don't know
if my feelings are what they used to be.
You really need to work, to learn all over again,
to get to know me.

No matter what we do,
no matter what we say,
it's all up to you now,
okay?

You are the one,
that will decide our fate.
So please bring me good news
before it's too late.

I've tried to move on,
but every time it fails.
Every time I think about you,
my thoughts and my heart soars and sails.

It is not fair,
simply unjust.
That I am still attached to you,
yet you are the one that turned us into rust.

As I talk to your related,
I can feel what I've been missing.
The fun times, the young growing old,
the simple feeling of being a part of something.

Of being appreciated,
a part of the family.
Yours was amazing to me,
as they still are, and always will be.

You are the exception,
to this loving rule.
Why did you have to break my heart
and act as though you were too cruel

To care about my feelings.
To care about us.
Am I the one that has to
salvage what was once

The perfect relationship?
No arguments or fights,
staying up half past five,
and then saying goodnight.

All those memorable times we had,
from Calaveras and "would you rather" to 31.
I still remember them,
but you act as though they're all done.

As though we are no more,
and never will be.
Why do you have to be so enigmatic?
Why are you doing this to me?

Choose what you want.
Make a decision.
Is it me that you want
or simply a complication

Of your heart and mind.
What you want, and what you need.
Please let me know,
so then I can feed

My empty and cold soul.
Those thoughts of you and I
are seeming very distant now
while thinking in bed I lie.

If only you could read this,
to finally see what I've been feeling.
These past three months have been terrible;
you saw my heart plummet and my thoughts reeling.

Into that great desparation
you sent me into.
Make up your mind
before my heart splits again in two.

It was mended before,
it can be fixed once again.
But please don't hurt it,
because it is on a mission.

A journey to your thoughts,
to see what you are thinking.
An odyssey to your dreams
to alter your dreaming.

To make you want me,
to make up your mind.
I used to think men are all alike,
but you are one of a kind

In both good ways and bad.
You were considerate and kind
up until the end.
When you did not mind

Killing my dreams for us.
So I ask of you,
to make a decision is a must.
For this is inhumane for me and you too.

Any day now,
I can't wait forever.
Think I've waited long enough,
for us to get back together?

It's now or never,
I'm not turning back.
Although I can't move on,
I can always replace what you lack;

A heart of compassion,
ever since that day,
when you lost what made you unique.
and if I may,

Say so myself,
every day was hell;
Not knowing if you cared,
or were even sure

If your decision was right,
but were too afraid to have it changed.
For chance that I had moved on,
and my heartbreak would be avenged.

To turn back the time
would simply be a miracle.
We could go back to when everything was
sweet and simple.

I love you more than I can express in words
even more than this poem can say.
The only thing that I can hope for,
is that you realize that you still feel the same way.






Posted by ChelseaTaylor_Delgado @ 5:04 PM